Sunday, August 10, 2014

Make it happen!

I tried to post this from my iPad yesterday, but something went was visible, then not visible... I'm trying again! And tomorrow there will be photos!

This is a totally relaxing weekend. I'm in the hammock, at the sweetest cottage, in the Oslofjord (I'm pining for the fiords!), it's hot, sometimes sunny, yesterday already I went swimming, music is French accordion, now I'm iPad-blogging and tonight we'll have taco. Thank you good friends for inviting me! 

I like to make plans, I've realized how good it is to have some concrete goals to work towards and to actually achieve something, even if it takes a while. It can be big things or small things, like learn to knit and chrochet. I learned that from books and then my friends helped me. I managed, it wasn't hard, and now I can't stop. One of the more major tasks I set for myself, was to finish my education and try to get a job I'm happy with. It took me a long time to even figure out what I wanted to study. I wasn't going to the university. No way. I took a year of journalism, worked in a local paper. Worked at a school. Then I ended up at the university still. Started my bachelor with one subject, finished with something else, a few years behind. It didn't matter. I got my diploma in cultural history. Then I didn't think I'd go for a master degree. I was really, really tired of going to school, but after a little while I realized it was necessary. I applied and was accepted. I changed the subject of my thesis after a year or so, I didn't finish in time, but I did graduate, I have a master degree from the University of Oslo, and it makes me really proud. Maybe it's no big deal. Lots and lots of people have a master. But nor my mum or my dad have any higher education. Neither my grandparents. I'm the first. And it landed me my dream job. 

That's another obsticle. Job interviews freaks me out. I get so nervous, there's so much at stake. I don't feel good enough, I feel that everybody else I so much more clever, more articulated, more ready for the "real world". I've been running from one contemporary job (though relevant) to another for so long, that it takes time to get used to another way. When I got my job, I couldn't believe they actually chose me. They chose me! That was a major confidence boost, and I felt I had reached a goal I've had for many, many years and worked really hard for. 

What I'm trying to say, is that the feeling of achieving something you really wish for is priceless. It energizes you for days, maybe weeks. It can be nothing really, like diving into a pool instead of just jumping. Diving used to be really scary, but that's one of my 2014-actions. My friend thought me, and now I'm diving from the cliffs at our cottage. Before this I had never dived before in my life. I started down hill skiing two years ago. I never did that before either. I took up gymnastics again, I've learned skills I never did as a kid. This fall I have new plans. The major one is well on it's way, I made up my mind after New Year and started taking lessons, but starting it is one thing, this time I will finish. I will face all my demons and get my drivers license. This time it feels like it actually could happen. I feel confident driving. I will make it. I can do it. I keep telling myself just that, and slovely my brain is changing it's mindset. It's been a long process, you can't imagine. For most people driving is piece of cake. Not for me, for some reason. But now I'm getting there, and I'll reward myself afterwards...but with what lol? I haven't decided, but of course I'd like my own car! Driving is fun, I want to drive all the time. How weird, I'm really another person now than just a few years back. 

What's your goals? I have two more that's coming next. I'm learning Illustrator, and I want to finish some projects, learn more techniques to personalize my work more. I have a lot half finished artwork at the moment! Next, I will attend a sewing class to learn how to make my own clothes. I can make skirts, that's it. I must be taught the techniques from the bottom, it will open up a whole new world of possibilities. But first, driving. Just driving. And thinking about it while relaxing, after swimming. 

Have a lovely weekend, will post cottage photos tomorrow, I brought my  DSLR! Oh shock, first time in quite a while;)


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